in the NST today...

At least two issues struck an uncomfortable chord. No, not the sickening religion issue.

One was an advert placed on page B4. Congratulating Mahdzir Bin Khalid for his appointment as the Kedah menteri besar. Nothing wrong with that cos lots of "ass-kissers" do that in Malaysia. Its a culture. But wait. This advert is placed by "THE GOVERNMENT AND PEOPLE OF THE STATE OF KEDAH DARUL AMAN"

Isnt the menteri besar part of the state government? What an utter waste of public funds, or did some rich person looking for a "big cable" pay for it.

Whats more sickening is the new campaign the government is having now. See Page B24. "Jangan membeli berlebihan - itu membazir!" It is launched by the Minstry of Domestic Trade and Consumer Affairs. A cool RM15 million allocaed for a "Smart Consumer" campaign ...".... as part of its efforts to help curb escalating household debt"

WTF lah. First you tell the people not to overspend. Then they put out a whole page advert congratulating themself! And to add salt to wound, they have the cheak to allocate RM15Million of OUR money to tell us to reign in the spending.

Any prick will tell you all you need to do is control the banks. Stop issuing more than 3 credit cards to a person. Have lower limits of spending. Revert back to the olden days where only someone earning a certain limit could apply for a card. Control financing of properties. Say NO to 90% or 95% or 100% financing. Whats so difficult? But when the government itself isnt spending our money wisely, this charade appears to be nothing more than another attempt to let someone get rich the Malaysian way (i.e. the RM15 million budget)

as a new year beckons

I dont feel that good. A year has almost passed by without much highs. And its ending with a lot of low points. That doesnt augur well for the coming year. For the past week, I have been very discouraged to blog. To start here would be to vent a lot of frustrations that we seem to be facing in this beautiful yet sadly, badly run country. It doesnt help when work on the table piles up and theres many things to be done for the new house.

This is a scary scenario. I could be unconscious in a hospital, and someone can just take my thumbprints and then claim that I had converted my religion. My entire estate, if HE thinks my time is up, then is taken from my family. All because theyre not of the same religion, it can be claimed. It becomes as though I did not exist for my family. It doesnt make sense. At all. The details of the case is still a bit sketchy, but whats been reported has scared the wits of lots of people. And YET we have NOT seen our MIC, MCA, Gerakan and other political parties saying a word on this matter. When the idiotic MP uttered the word "Keling" in parliment and was rebuked by DAP (of all people), where were MIC, PPP and Gerakan? When one knows something is considered an insult by others, one wouldnt (if one was a decent person), utter such insulting words. But then again, decency is a subjective matter nowadays. Perhaps i should at all times keep a small piece of char siew, sealed in a plastic bag, in my wallet. Now, thats a thought.

Then we have the proposed laws affecting the majority here. Husbands can divorce and then seek maintenance from the wife! Equal rights, it seems. Our PM has the cheek to say that whatever unjust provisious can be amended later. And so, we tolerate third class work and allow for amendment later.He has lost all credibility. It is very obvious he is not in charge of the country. These women are being treated like objects.

So much for saying theyre of compassion and fairness.

I was driving to work this morning as usual, and this hit me. In the indian dialects, the word "swami" is a primarily Hindu honorific, loosely akin to "master". It is derived from the Sanskrit language and means "owner of oneself", denoting complete mastery over instinctive and lower urges.It is a title added to one's name to emphasize learning and, of course, mastery of a specific field of knowledge, most often religious and/or spiritual.

Why do i bring this up? In the Malay language, theyve adopted this word i.e. spelt as "suami", to mean "husband". Is it a cultural thing then. The Lord and master of the home. Owner of himself and all who are tied to him.

What else has been bugging me. Work related ones. Someone appeared to have screwed up in the branches. Its a bit worrying.

On a general basis, theres no signs of control over over-building in the country. The financial institutions are bearing the weight of this potential nightmare.

On a somewhat lighter side, can one really believe that students nowadays are getting smarter? The number of students getting sraight As is absolutely mind-boggling. I wonder if those getting As in English at PMR level are able to speak decent English. (Naturally almost anyone can speak indecent English)

There is no accountability at all anywhere. Government or GLCs. Everyone spends money like its their right to. They manage as though its their house. Not as a responsibility held in trust for the public.

Then we had the year end circus act. To drape the grand pyramids with flags. Sigh. An equivalent to the normal government department and local authority "lawatan sambil belajar"/study tour, where the tours are primary reasons, at taxpayers expense. Now it seems the Egyptian authorities will NOT approve of such stupid things.

Which brings back to how we seem to be donating millions all over the world, but find it difficult to fund the needy here. It is downright sickening. Millions collected for victims of the tsunami have yet to fully trickle down to those deserving.

I guess I could go on and on and on. And it wouldnt serve a purpose. I complain not because i hate this country, but because i hate the way it is being screwed by the managers. We should be comparing ourselves with first world economies, but instead the defenders would say we are doing so much better than indonesia or african countries.

There has not been many highs. I guess most highs have been related to D and K. They're a wonder to be with. Testing our patience to the limits most times, but nevertheless a joy to spend time with. To see them grow up to what they have become at times I wish we could do more. Spend more hours. Taking them around. Theyre heading to nursery and kindergarten next year. K coped well during orientation this week but appeared a bit fearful of being alone. She should do well. D on the other hand is taking time to get used to being in a classroom. She's excited yet she could be at a disadvantage for a while since the rest of the students had the benefit of attending nursery this year. On hindsight our decision to let her skip nursery may not have been a good decision.

We're heading to KL tomorrow morning for a couple of days. If weather is fine, I hope to drive up to Ipoh on sunday morning to meet up with an old friend and his family, for a day trip. By wednesday, work on the house should commence. And surprise surprise, i finally signed up with Clark Hatch last week, after procastinating about it over the past few years. Time to get back into decent shape.

Its going to be a very interesting start to the year. Lots of expectations and dreams. Only time will tell how the coming year will turn out to be. Anyone know a good feng shui master? astrologer? Time expended writing this. I should have used that time to finish up my work! Its already 330pm and its time to head to the bank. Looks like work will have to wait till next year.

Cheers! everyone. May you find what youre looking for in the following "mat salleh" new year.

vic

Seventh Rangers Mechanized

Its about time. We have our own heroes blogging about their past and their lives. Fantastic site, i would say, though i have just started reading a bit. Do check out this site.>> http://7rangers.blogspot.com/

Another attempt to hijack

tulipcat (22/12/2005 10:00:44 AM): visit my site, has some photos www.yahoo-photos.tux.nu

Naturally i didnt fall for it this time around. The classic way to get people to divulge their ID and password by putting up a similar looking login page.

40-year old virgin

Just finished watching the 40-year old virgin movie [yes, the cheap RM5 pirate dvd9 version) just now. Slapstick comedy, as usual. Would i recommend others to watch? Yes, for some mild fun and laughs.

The guy was a 40-year old virgin not because of choice. He did try to make out, but the movie potrayed him as a dork who kept on messing up. Eg kicking a gal in the face just when she was starting to suck his toe! After a few disasters, he built high walls around himself and the years just went by. It was somewhat implied he was into D-I-Y very occasionally. Or was he lying? Nah, i wont watch it again to verify.

That movie brought back old memories. Memories of a guy who went around chat rooms proudly proclaiming to be a virgin. (And boasting that women who met up with him wanted to have sex with him, cos supposedly he was good looking) Naturally when i asked if he indulged in D-I-Y, he got pissed off and refused to answer. (that answered my question,naturally) Of course i was just teasing the bugger. Virginity relates not to D-I-Y, but relations with another.

As for the issue of virginity, i would say the movie isnt about that though the title is. It isnt about someone waiting for true love or marriage before he/she surrenders themself.

Is there any movies out there about people wanting to remain virgins for strictly cultural and religion reasons? The way society is heading, the homely side of me knows in the years to come i may have huge battles to face on this issue.

a note to the anonymous one..

No, i am not writing to myself.

I received a comment for one of my earlier blog postings. Surprisingly the comment was received via email and not shown in the blog. And, no, due to the nature of the content, i feel it best not to post it here.

Reading the email brought back some memories of pleasant times from the past. I appreciated the contents of it. Though i have a hunch on who could have sent it, naturally i have no conclusive proof. But it doesnt matter.

Perhaps i should state here that i am not into violence. I feel that violence does not solve the problem. Killing another human being does not bring back anything. There is no justification at all. Gratifying perhaps for the evil. So, when it comes to acts of terrorism, i am dead against it. I am also against the bullying hypocrite attitude of some countries. The feeling extends to a certain extent to the corrupt ways of most of our police (and society). [yeah..i know, am a hypocrite...i am but a weak human being after all]

And so, whilst we remember of the past, we must be prepared to accept the fact that things will get worse in future. We just have to exercise more restraint on our emotions, no matter how difficult it is. And battle ourselves to face what life throws at us.

aisey...

Too late to be anon huh, sic? :(

There goes my plans to pretend to be a tall well built aussie hunk residing at JB with a high performance german sports car :(

Well, the veil has been lifted. We shall see where this heads.

Looking forward to a break to KL next weekend. So many things to be done.. yet so little time. (yeah.. blog summore.. YM summore.. fantasy footie summore.. long lunch breaks....no wonder not enuff time!)

To be or not to be...anonymous

The online world since it first started has created the opportunity for people to be somewhat anonymous to others. The world of chat for instance allows you to create almost any identity and communicate with whomsoever you so wish within the yahoo, msn and other environments. In most cases the players here do exchange contact details and some do meet up either in a one-to-one or group meet-ups. Almost always nothing much personal is revealed and the parties in the game mostly see the exterior one wants the other to see. Occasionally the more confident or non-fearing (or foolish some say) even real almost everything real about themselves.

Then came the blogs or online diaries. What started off as personal diaries has today become online diaries for the world to see and share. What one may have started as a place to pen personal thoughts and opinions, ends up now being a place so share with others. In some instances, where interest is generated or amongst a pool of friends, theres an active exchange of banter within this domain.

And we keep reading in the media about how such blogs as they gain popularity and following exposes the writer to a larger audience then it was first intended to. Clients and colleagues and bosses get to know about it and they start to read. They start to see whats in your mind. Whatever comments you may have posted. They start to see if they were mentioned in the blogs. If their photos were there for the world to see. Issues of privacy creeps in. Things get messy when the blog contains not so favourable thoughts of others and those "others" start reading too.

And so, life potentially has the danger of becoming extremely messy and awkward. Why do i suddenly go into this phobia-like mode?

Well, what started off as an innocent and honest attempt to remain anonymous to a certain extent to the public at large, has now potentially the means of blowing over into unsolicited attention. Not that it really matters cos from day one, i have refrained from being too personal, and not revealing the characters that revolve around my life.

But yesterday as i was chatting up with an old buddy, i came to realise the person we were talking about, who maintains a blog in cyberspace, is someone i know in real life. And the person is attached with a company where i do extensive work for. Their staff and bosses are my clients...some are close friends.

Its funny how they say, cyberspace is a small world. Fancy meeting someone out of the blue whom you know in real life. I've experienced this before.

The oldest friend that i have, since standard 2 in primary school, mind you, used to be in constant contact up to our early uni days. By then my faculty was transferred to a different state and we only kept in touch like once a year or less. I had started casual chat within the yahoo chat rooms around 1997 and sometime in 99 or 2000, the exact year doesnt come to memory, a funny incident occured. I remember i was at home, and it was late nite. I was in this KL chat room and this guy was there claiming to be in JB. We exchanged pleasantries and he eventually claimed to be my junior at our secondary school. I thought..ok..this is cool. But didnt think much of it. Was it the next day? He messaged me and asked if ............. was my name. And i went :O wtf! He revealed his identity and we had a good laugh! The rest is history, and we have been in constant contact since then.

I digress too much, as usual.

So, here is a person whom i know, who's company gives me much work. And who's staff and bosses are people known to me. Its somewhat become awkward. There are many photos within that blog. Photos of people within that company. People that i know. Wonder if they know their pics are online for the world to see. Its a funny situation :D

Well, lets see where this goes. The question will remain unanswered for now, to be or not to be...anonymous.

The dinner

The dinner was fine. Only 3 of us sitting in a table meant for 10. Food was good, except for the soup. The szechuan soup was a disappointment and incomparable to the one served at the Mutiara. Naturally by the 6th dish we went back.

And what transpired. Well, we were told that the State had donated about RM500K plus or thereabout, and the temple had raised a few hundred Ks of their own funds. They now needed another RM500K or thereabout for the burners, fencing etc.

Does it really cost that much? I have yet to check it up. But as i wrote earlier, what concerns me is the community is being asked to raise the funds when it is, in my opinion, one of the fundamental duties of the State. Be thankful that the State has chipped in? I dont think so. They should be paying the full sum.

our basic right to leave in peace

I was at a temple a few nights ago (yes, occasionally i do go over, mainly to pray for my family's good health and happiness). A friend walked over and asked if i wanted to buy a dinner ticket. Well, i had the cash, so i took a ticket. RM200. At a seafood restaurant.

It was a fund raising dinner. The indian community in johor bahru, spearheaded by one of the temples in town and with the backing of the MIC was organising a fund raising dinner to build a crematorium here! Seems that the building was completed, and now they needed funds to get the burners and ancillary stuff. Seems too that part of the initial cost was forked out by the State Authority.

Ok, at this point of time, the basic details are such. Perhaps tonight i will get the exact information and the parties involved.

Upon receipt of the ticket, i engaged my friend into a discussion. Isnt it the right of the citizen of this country to expect the State (either the federal, state or local authorities) to be responsible for burial and cremation facilities?

Why is it for so many years there has not been proper allocation of burial spots for Hindus, within the city area? The one at Jalan Kebun Teh is so used up that some uneasy stories have been emerging over the past years. I heard of stories where old neglected graves being exhumed and buried deeper, and a new gravesite prepared over it! [this appears to be acceptable within some communities, supposedly]

Sad to say, up to now there is not a single crematorium built by the State within Johor Bahru. I am uncertain of the situation within other districts but do know that within the Klang Valley there are local councils that actually built and managed them for the public.

So, what do the Hindus do thus far? Well, most head to the Chinese creamatoriums managed by their community bodies, or to private facilities. And when all else is unavailable, they just opt for the traditional wood fire cremation within the existing cemetaries. The problems do not end there.

For Hindus, once the remains are cremated, the following day the remains are immersed into flowing water i.e. the river or the sea. There are various beliefs and reasons for doing so. After a certain number of days, prayers are also held at the waterfront and some items (bio-degradeable and non-poinsonous therefore ok for the environment) are also immersed into the flowing water. There has been many instances in the past where grieving parties holding such ceremonies being asked by local authority officers to move away. Thus instances of people even going to various extents such as doing prayers in the early pre-dawn times, just to avoid a summon, so as to perform a very basic prayer requirement for the departed. [trust me, sitting om the beach and performing prayers during pre-dawn with a drizzling rain, every rain drop hitting your skin like a needle, while grieving the loss of a loved one, isnt only a torture but an insult to the living, and the dead]

There is no imposition of our cultural or religious beliefs upon others. Is it too much to expect the government to be equally responsible for the departed Hindu, or for that matter non-muslim, tax paying citizens? Very very few Hindus wish to be buried. Cremation is the preferred choice, and it is a practical choice without placing burden on our scarce land. Yes, perhaps there environmental issues, but its nothing compared to the blatant pollution we're subjected to by industries in this country.

Perhaps those trying to raise funds will attempt to explain these issues. I have my doubts. For far too long, we are being treated like trash. And i dont foresee things to change in my short remaining lifespan. Perhaps this too explains why the chinese community had long ago spearheaded self-sufficiency in taking care of their living and their dead, amongst others. There will be some rejoicing the fact that finally there is going to be a facilty for the community.

But then, in the first place, shouldnt it have been the basic responsibility of the State to provide this decades ago?

The Malaysian way...

The Chairman wants our quote.
The exec calls and asks for quote
Quotation sent in
Without revealing too much of methodology or technical views
They call for a meeting with the COO
Wait a while and he comes in late and doesnt apologize
He asks if thats the best we can do, and we say yes.
He asks how we arrive at our opinion
We oblige
He appears to understand and says we should convey this to the Chairman.
Meeting with the government department is the next day
Asks us for reasons they can give to seek postponement.
We oblige again.
COO asks us to wait for their call whether we need to attend meeting next day
Shakes hand.
Out of the blue zaps a request for the one page calculations (work product)
Well, we've got the job, or so it appeared. So we give it.
We go back to our office. Ok, its a small job, but we should start preparing now
We wait.. and wait.. and wait
No arrangement to meet the Chairman
No calls, so we presume the meeting the next day is off
7pm or thereabout, exec calls to say they havent decided who to offer the job to!
We are to hold on, so to speak!
When pressed if there are others in the picture, exec relents and admits
Admits the other party was going to be appointed!
KNNCB!
Told the exec this is ungentlemanly conduct.They were using us.
Demanded views were conveyed to the COO
COO calls back shortly after
Says he had a meeting with the Chairman, and they decided to go for someone else
He didnt even read our note, or so he says.
Claims its the Chairman who wanted it!
KNNCB!
Told him off for using and misleading us.Ungentlemanly conduct!
You dont do all of the above, and then at the last moment cut us off
Felt like slamming the phone but then, its the cheap nokia.
Cut the call off in disgust.
Its a small job. But its the principle that matters.
Trust doesnt count much in the jungle out there.
Work product got hijacked.
Lesson learnt.

its a jinx

Go to a restaurant or eatery and almost always what i ordered wont be what i will get!!!!! Or somehow or rather the order will get screwed up or forgotten. This has happened all too often over the years. Sigh.

Took 3 of my staff out for lunch earlier at this new cafe on the ground floor of Landmark IT Mall. The previous outlet there, Coffee Company was hopeless. The new one has nice decor and strikingly red fabric chairs. Wish had taken some snaps, perhaps later.

Three of us ordered nasi briyani ayam just to check its quality. The fourth person took grilled fish with buttered rice. It was a set meal. Soup of the day and a choice of coffee or tea.

Table is set up. No problems there.

Then it starts! Coffee and tea was served ..LOL! Two coffes and two teas. The teas were almost to the rim of the cups. The coffee was only three quarter, it was strikingly odd!! Arghh dunno to laugh or scream now. WTF lah. Told the waiter and he was blur like the typical ah beng. Asked for the manager, there was none. Only 3 waiters and a cook in the kitchen, i think. The coffee was topped up, but then again it was so diluted and tasteless, so topping up was a waste of time. Strike 1!

Then the soup came in. Asked the waiter what was the soup of the day, and he said vegetable soup. Stirred it and i saw meat and crabmeat pieces! Asked him what meat, he wasnt sure. Tastd chicken. But the soup was bland... so very bland. Strike 2!!

So we had coffee/tea cups and soup bowls on the table for four. And they started serving the main dishes!!! Without clearing the soup! We were stunned, again! WTF! One hand takes the soup bowl, the other hand lays the main dish.

Guess what, every one got their dishes. 2 briyanis and a fish. I was served fish, even though i clearly asked for briyani. Dungu waiter! Any other familiar place, i would have graciously accepted the fish. But here, no. I was not happy to start with. This blunder now was plain annoying. No apology offered, there was a conference between the chef and three waiters and the i think the chef told them, no problem, he will get a briyani. Strike 3!!!

Food was hopeless. Rice was not briyani rice. It was more like nasi minyak with lots of colouring. Chicken was a drumstick piece that was deep fried and poured over with some "masak merah" gravy. Ejected from the stadium!!!!

I told my staff its the principle. If youre paying prices way above food court or hawker prices, then you deserve better service and food. If a mamak restaurant fella switches my order and makes that mistake, i would say no problem. Am not that particular about food.

Paid the bill and we walked out of the place knowing we wont be going there again.

And yes, sic. I ate everything except the chicken bones. Dont like to waste food, even if it doesnt taste great..LOL. Anyway, hungry lah.

Malaise? Rhymes with Malaysia, doesnt it?

We were having lunch at Hai Tien Lo at Putri Pan Pacific Johor Bahru. Why? Out of convenience for the clients. Never because its good.

Service was bad. The waiter/captain was mostly wasnt giving full attention when we arrive. Its like you can enter and go out, and nobody would care less. That was perhaps indicative of how things were going to get.

The menus are handed to us and the guy leaves. 3 other tables only are occupied. Another indication that the place isnt doing well. The waiter doesnt come back to ask for orders, you have to call him over. Dont bother about recommendations. He recommended "mapoh tofu" or something sounding like that and claypot tofu as the so-called customer favourites. And he didnt know what "mapoh" tofu looked like or how its cooked.

A mix of ala-carte and dim sum was ordered, and guess what. The venison black pepper style arrives first and the dim sum about 10 minutes later! And the waiter doesnt even ask if we wanted rice/noodles. Eventually the dim sum arrives. Everthing comes. Food was average.

Your saucers/plates arent changed unlike in good restaurants. They dont come to pour chinese tea, what more to top-up. They dont ask if they can clear plates, only doing so when the table is too crowded for new dishes.

Nobody asks if dessert is wanted. We got to ask for choices. Clearing of table is extremely slow.

Would i go again? Food was average. Thats the first time i am going there after about 2 to 3 years at least. And i am reminded again today not to in future.

Perhaps this malaise is reflective in almost all sectors within the country. Most leaders cant be bothered. Most guys in decision making in running the country cant be bothered. Most civil servants cant be bothered. Most local authorities cant be bothered. Theyre all bothered about "whats in it for them, personally".

almost a year now...
How time flies. Its late November now. In a few weeks, it will be the first anniversary of his passing away. We are going around and phoning close ones to invite them over for prayers at our home. It's deja-vu all over again.

I remember writing at that point on whether time will be a healer of pain and sadness. At this point of time, i would say no. Time has not been the healer for those who mourn. It all depends whether one lets one's mind wander and reflect upon the past. If hypothetically one would block out the past, and just lives the moment and looks forward in life, perhaps that is different.

As for me, its those fleeting moments when i see his photo. Or when am alone and i think of the past. Or when my daughters innocently asks if he is still at the hospital or God's home. And when he is coming back. They still remember him. The elder one misses him and occasionally says she wish he came back and took her to the playground everyday. [sigh, daddy has been guilty of not doing this regularly Image ] The younger one just a few days back, lay on the bed, lifted a leg and crossed the other while keeping her hands folded beneath her head. And she smiled and said that was how he lies down.

Driving past the General Hospital with the kids is never easy. The younger one would point and say that is where he is. Thats where we last saw him alive.

It is easier said than done to just think of the good times and appreciate the times we had together. But it is still all too easy to get a bit teary-eyed. Perhaps the hurt is not been able to actually say our goodbyes. Or to assure him that all will be taken care of after his passing. But then again, nobody realised he would go away that soon.

I hope the following few weeks will pass by fast. That all will go one smoothly. As a tribute to him. That all is and will always be well. It almost impossible, but i think we have to try.

"Goodbye
How does one reflect upon or mourn the death of one who was respected and admired but supposedly later ended up being the most wanted terrorist in the region.

He and his wife were loved by many of us students. They were caring. They taught what they knew. They knew what they taught. And they made us think. They made us expect more. They had set a benchmark for other lecturers within the faculty.

For two years i.e. 4 semesters, he had taught us the subject of valuation, during our second and third years. He was one of the nicest guys around, you could say he was like one of us. And am told for many years thereafter others continued to enjoy his teachings.

Perhaps the last that i saw and spoke to him was in the early to mid 90s. He presented a paper on multiple regression analysis and monte carlo simulation, and their uses in the valuation profession. Yes, this was a man who was good with his numbers. And he was able to convey his thoughts and opinions. He wasnt one of those who lifted paragraphs or chapters from books and delivered them as lecture notes to the audience.

Till today, the news of his alleged involvement within the terrorist circle has yet to sink in. It is difficult to understand. Did his stay in UK and later his work attachment at Indonesia change him? I dont know. Did he do all the things thats he is being accused of? I dont know that for sure either. God will be the judge of him now.

All that i know is he will continue to be remembered for all the good that he had done. For all his coaching and advice. For all his positive motivation. Yes, am sure the outgoing batch of 1987/88 will always remember this man in a positive light.

Goodbye Dr Azahari Husin.
"

I believe quite a while ago there was a bit of controversy going on regarding some competitions and the country's religious authorities say that games of chance was forbidden.

There I was in the National Savings Bank (BSN) this morning accompanying my Mom and I realised that BSN's got their own savings bond lucky draw every month. This has been going on for years now. The BSN is fully government owned. And these lucky draws are games of chance. Numbers are picked at random, and the lucky winner gets prizes like luxury cars and other stuff.

How come all these years no one has said anything about these draws to be forbidden aka haram?

It doesnt suprise me cos as usual, this country is filled with hypocrites who say one thing, and yet dont practice it.

I digress. The PM's beloved wife has passed away. She was a productive person well loved by many. Not because of who her husband was, but mainly for who she was personally and the work that she has done. It is obvious that the mass media has made millions from the condolence adverts over the past few years. What an utter waste of money. Money that should have been used to alleviate poverty. To help the hardcore poor. Disgusting. Just as disgusting as the congrats adverts whenever some person gets a datukship or whatever medal. "

"Bahasa Malaysia, Bahasa Inggeris
'Hishammuddin Mahu Bahasa Melayu Dimartabatkan Semula'
Ahh. Lots of fiery discussions online and otherwise, about more importance to be given to the Bahasa Malaysia ...blah ...blah..blah.

For starters. What does UMNO stand for. UMNOputras are so arrogant, generally. Wielding keris. Screaming nationalism. Tetapi, apakah erti perkataan UMNO itu sendiri? UMNO = United Malay National Organisation.

Kalau saya tidak silap, United Malay National Organisation adalah perkataan-perkataan bahasa inggeris. Saya rasa pihak-pihak yang menggunakan bahasa inggeris sebagai nama organisasi mereka tidak ada hak untuk berjuang untuk memartabatkan bahasa Malaysia ;)"

Property market, south Johor

It is becoming too common for players in the property market to inflate their sale and purchase agreements. Examples would be, concluding a sale at say RM200,000 but in the sale and purchase agreement its stated as RM220,000. With that, and a 90% loan from the ever so friendly bankers in the present situation, the buyer practically gets 100% financing. And thats only assuming the mark-up is only 10%! There are cases noted where the mark-up even goes to about 30-40% above the actual price.

Now, some might wonder that this isnt such a bad thing after all. People continue to buy properties. Unfortunately this is the signs of a bubble economy. Waiting to implode, and hurt, again, and again, and again. We never learn. Our administrators of the economy have short term memories, always.

Assuming almost everyone marks up their agreement, on record it appears as though prices keep on rising, indicating a booming market! Government compiled records dont factor this anomaly. Everything appears to be rosy for the past year. For stamp duty purposes, the Government would be happier if the agreements are marked up as the taxes are based on the sale price or market value, whichever is higher.

The rest of the players indulging in this activity i.e. the solicitors, estate agents, loan facilitators a.k.a. 'runners' etc, couldnt care less either. As long as the buyer gets the loan and the sale goes through, nobody could care less of the repercussions.

Which leaves us the banking sector. Almost gone are the days where bankers are prudent and insist on protecting the interests of the bank. The frontliners are mostly sales people. People who work on commissions and with high sales targets. Theyre pressured to deliver. To ensure that the banks have a fantastic loan growth.

In the late 1990s we started having bankers undercutting each others interest rates by offering staggered rates with subsidized levels in the first year of two. This was to encourage re-financing of loans. Whilst the end-user or borrowers benefited, so much of work was generated without much real benefit to the economy. The left hand was passing money to the right hand.

And now, so many at the local level appear to be dropping their guard and closing an eye to this "marked-up" agreements situation.

Property consultants have a major challenge in their hands. Gone are the days where they can rely on records of property prices being transacted and form an opinion on the value of a specific property. The declared sums on agreements, now more so than in the past, cannot be relied at all. To do so, would be to the detriment of their practice.

The act of developers providing "discounts" to the prices of their developed units doesnt help the situation either.

Over the past few years, too many developers have simultaneously lauched andd developed big mixed residential schemes in the outskirts of the city centre. And the past few months see many of them having unsold units that have been completed and issued with Certificates of Fitness for Occupation. In an apparent act of desperation many have been giving discounts or rebates, along the lines of the marked-up agreements. For example, one could buy a double storey terrace house for RM220,000 by paying perhaps around RM1000 only, and upon signing of the loan documentation and release of funds, get a rebate of RM20,000 from the developer! Yes, the 100% financing days are back. Many banks are openly condoning this practices.

As to why regulating bodies of the financial industry has yet to take any action, I have no idea. It is not prudent lending to lend margins of 100% or even 95%. Is greed the motivating factor that is blinding the players?

As always the property market will move in cycles. Without real growth in the southern johor region, nor any new major investments coming in, current events appear to be worrisome. Whilst properties within the city centre and immediate prime residential suburbia appear to be resilient and to a certain extent appreciating, the outskirts of the city centre appear to be very shaky.

As always, ceteris paribus is the qualifying statement. It means, assuming all else is constant, as at this present time. Whether this present prognosis will hold water, remain to be seen. Personally, I am very very cautious now, bordering on pessimism.

Doesn't each citizen have the right to be critical when things are being done so very wrongly in this country? Wishing that our country prospers and every single citizen enjoys the benefits and not "ditindas" is wrong?

Wishing that poverty was eradicated, and the poor be uplifted economically, and not concentrating on enriching the croonies, is wrong? Wishing that the government was more responsible and not let countless of our young students migrate overseas for good (e.g. Singapore taps our best students when theyre in their early teens) is wrong? And yet the government has the cheek to initiate programs to attracts "brains" back to the country, which naturally fails. What an irony!

The article by "David Cyranoski: Malaysian biotechnology: The valley of ghosts" in the magazine NATURE was fair comment, me thinks. Yes, to a certain extent superficial since it fails to highlight our research achievements in the bio-tech field. But then again, his highlight was the Bio-valley, and how and why its become a white elephant. And his comments on how the government doesnt walk the talk (or failing to get the best brains to walk the talk), is after all true.

Blogthings - Your Birthdate: June 25: "What Does Your Birth Date Mean?

Your Birthdate: June 25
Your birth on the 25th day of the month (7 energy) modifies your life path by giving you some special interest in technical, scientific, or other complex and often hard to understand subjects.
You may become something of a perfectionist and a stickler for details.
Your thinking is logical and intuitive, rational and responsible.

Your feelings may run deep, but you are not very likely to let them show.
This birthday makes you a more private person, more introspective and perhaps more inflexible.
In friendships you are very cautious and reserved.
You are probably inventive, and given to unique approaches and solutions."

Its been 2 years since i started blogging here. Its been very interesting. To be able to put into words thoughts and events. Something to reflect upon. And after seeing the first entry i made, i can say i have managed to toe the line. Privacy of people around me have been maintained. Those i write about, will know its them am referring to. The rest wouldnt have an idea at all.

How time flies. And how fast kids grow. And how i still procastinate and not put up their pictures online in a photo album.

Since mid June, i've been toying around with 360.yahoo.com. Its a bit interesting cos it enables a connection with the friends i have on Yahoo Messenger. Well. Lets see how it goes. I have yet to decide whether to keep both blogs or to use just one.

On kids and numbers

Weird (some call it sad, suey, tough luck) thing happened a couple of evenings back. My elder 4 year old daughter and I popped by the new house. I had wanted to check the house to see if there were signs of water leak after a heavy thunderstorm. It was about 6.30pm and she was tugging my pants and walking alongside, fearful of the place. No one else in sight in the neighbourhood, no lighting. It was after all a recently completed scheme.

As i was locking the gates, she looked up at the house and said 'dad..i dont like number 11! (the house number). I was taken aback. Asked her why and she just shrugged her shoulders and said she didnt like it. Naturally i couldnt resist asking her what number she liked. She blurted out 165. Aisey, 3 digit number. Pestered her again, what other numbers she liked. She said '25'. Was taken aback again. 25 being my date of birth. 630pm and it wasnt too late to pop by the number forecast shops and get the numbers. Alas, i didnt. It was getting dark, and didnt like the idea of taking her along to go buy numbers!

Didnt think much about it till the next morning. Opened the dailies and as usual after glancing at the usual killing and bad news on the front page, was reading the sports pages. There it was. 3D results. 165 was the 2nd prize for that draw!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I believe this was the second time over the past few years she has said a sequence of numbers that somehow or rather ended up in the winning numbers that evening. Sigh. Sad case. Daddy wasnt a compulsive gambler. Nevermind. Will keep ears wide open and act upon the next time kids blurt out numbers out of the blue Image "

Insanity

Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.- Albert Einstein (1879 - 1955)


Had a brief chat with friend regarding the above just a moment ago.

Friend: most of us are insane then
Me: indeed. Image but most wont admit it
Friend: Image
Friend: well if the world is full of insane ppl it shudnt be a problem
Me: the world has lots of insane ppl..the only prob is most dont admit it..or dont know it
Friend: wht one doesnt know doesnt hurt
Me: it hurts others
Friend: how cud it when the other is insane too?
Me: insane ppl got feelings too Image
Me: when one is insane... he or she does insane stuff... some of these stuff hurts other ppl, without he or she knowing it
Friend: yeah i guess so
Friend: esp if tht someone is close or important to us
Me: yup..true"

For the past couple of days i've been spending more time reading blogs online. And i've come to realise theres a nice bunch of people out there who write wonderfully with much wit and humour and not to mention intellect. People like Amit who collates lots of IT related stuff and writes about them, as well as people like Kenny sia, Minishorts, Aizuddin, Lilianchan etc. Then theres this thing called Project Petaling Street which has enabled Malaysian bloggers to group up. Theyve met up twice, from what i gather. The writings are diverse. And there is much interaction within the respective blogs.

I think, at one point when KLGC1 was created by yahoo, it attracted that diverse range of people. Those were quite the fun days. Adults and teens, bilingual with the preference being english.

Well, as i read at one of the blog sites, i had these thoughts. Humans have the tendency to point errors of others. To look for fault in others and their beliefs. Whereas the exact opposite should be the case. One should be looking within and aiming to be a better person, for almost all of us are with faults. Wouldnt the world be a better place if everyone operated on that basis. To respect that there is someone out there who believes in something else contrary to our own beliefs. And that we have no right to tell them that theyre wrong purely on the basis of the teachings we've each received during our upbringing.

"Red devils
'Mourinho also admitted his surprise about fans' loyalty in Britain, highlighting the case of Sir Alex Ferguson's United, who were given a standing ovation at Old Trafford at the end of the season despite failing to win a trophy. 'I saw the Manchester United players and manager after their last home game go for a lap of honour after losing to us. 'If they had done that in Portugal they would have had bottles thrown at them,' said Mourinho. '

-------------------------------------------------------------

Its a good idea to keep in thought, just in case the red devils fail to win anything this coming season! I'd aim directly at Fergie whom i blame totally for last season's disaster. Poor selections and tactics almost the entire season. sigh."

Went and saw the house. Its in good shape. Some minor works need to be reported.

As for housewarming and moving in, it will have to wait. Would personaly prefer to wait till early next year. Perhaps during the long chinese new year break. The coming months would give me sufficient time to plan what needs to be done.

Visited the doc earlier. Rest for another month was the prescription. Just when i thought of heading to the gym and work out daily! Damn. Got to delay the workouts yet again. :D:D:D (excuses, excuses, excuses)

Still so very tired now. Was in office till very late last night working on a spreadsheet. And when one is so tired, one realises Excel has a maximum limit in terms of rows per worksheet. 65,536 rows by 256 columns! Had to breakup the file into a few sheets. Hopefully will have the time to transfer the entire file into Access later today. Wish there was a good cake shop within a stone's throw away. Whenever tired, would love to just pop in and buy some cheesecakes and release stress by eating. Errr on second thoughts, best not. Just got warned again about weight. Sigh. Most of the best things in life are forbidden! Or at best, taken in moderation only. But then again, moderation in subjective.

Bombs all over London yesterday. It's sickening. How life is just wasted away. Actions that never solve any problems, only compounding them. So many lives taken. So many lives affected in the worst ways by the deaths. Killings everywhere. Almost everyday. The mind has become a bit numb. It goes ..'oh, a few more died yesterday. what else is new!'.

"

The day to go and collect the keys to the house! Should be leaving shortly. Hope all will be well.

After using 360 yahoo for a while, i think it would be great if yahoo has a mechanism whereby the user is alerted when someone posts a comment on the blog. As it stands more often than not, comments made on older blog entries will be missed out.
"

The most memorable encounter with a female chatter!

There i was. Sitting patiently at a quiet corner at the freezing KLIA. The time was around midnight. It was sometime in the late 1990s. 1998? 1999? My memory fails me yet again. Topaz was one of the first friends i had encountered in yahoo chat and we migrated to ICQ (which was a big thing back then. Now? ive no idea whatsoever)

She was funny and direct. Very outspoken and wasnt the shy type. We had lots of interesting chats. She was a traffic warden in Perth. She drove a 4000 or 5000 cc vehicle that they called a car. Thunderbird? Something... i cant remember :)) She loved her job and she had lots of free time. One fine day she said she was flying into KL and asked if it was possible to meet up!!!! YES! Perfect idea!

After an hour of waiting, it was beginning to be very uncomfortable. The coldness in the arrival hall was a killer. So much for intelligent building systems. They cant even adjust the airconditioning temp. to comfy levels. Finally the plane landed. Touchdown. And the second phase of waiting begun. The usual waiting for luggage being delivered and their respective owners praying their luggages dont get misdirected or pilfered. At the last minute, i realised i forgot to buy something for her. And ran to the souvenier shops. None open except the choc shops! Naturally went for a big box of ferrero rocher. If she didnt like it, i could eat it. Or we could share :D

Stood there waiting at the arrival hall. And there she came, walking, with a beaming smile on her lovely face. I wasnt prepared for the overwhelming moment. Had seen her photo earlier but it was of poor resolution and taken from afar. Here was a lady in her late 20s, standing around 5'10', slim and probably weighing around 55-60kg, blue eyes and ahem... well endowed. C cup was my silent guess. We hugged and exchanged pleasantries. She was a really sweet lady. She was on transit at 9am or thereabouts and needed sleep. And it was time to leave. We hugged and said our goodbyes.

Many months later she got engaged and married a chat friend of hers from USA, and they got married on a riverboat in Perth on Valentines Day.

But that night at KLIA was unforgetable. She was worth the travel and 2 hour wait at KLIA. Oh yes, my mrs too enjoyed her company and found her to be a very nice person.

The day i sat for my first year first semester exam for the compulsory islamic studies or something subject, and saw the first question, i gave up on the U. It was run by insensitive asses. That first question sidelined the entire non-muslim student community and all subsequent complaints was brushed aside.It was an objective question which went along the lines of which of the following religions originated from revelations by God. Naturally, i marked all the spaces - A to E. And naturally it was the wrong answer in the U's eyes.

The first thing i did when i was the editor of the student magazine in my dept. during my final year, was to critisize the quality of lecturers. People who had no practical knowledge and only a first degree called themselves lecturers. Unfortunately that article never got published. The head of dept. called me aside and told me (words ill remember forever)..'lets not make our secret the world's secret!'

Defining moment during my stay there would be during my fourth year and my colleague asking the lecturer a simple question. In arriving at a solution to a problem, the lecturer had said that certain percentage adjustments needed to be made. For example, a land fronting the main road against a land immediately behind it. The fore was more valuable. Better accessibility, commercial exposure, potential for development etc etc. Colleague asked how would one arrive at the percentage adjustments..and her nonchalant reply was one did it based on experience. Naturally, all of us grinned. And my fellow student retorted and said...that would mean people who just graduated with no experience would therefore not be able to work!!! Everyone except the lecturer laughed. She was pissed mad. She just made a fool out of herself. Cos in actual fact, there are quantitative means to arrive at such adjustments. Thats another story.

Then again, i cant be too harsh on them. Screwed up my "

Paper chase

"http://www.kfcplainfield.com/sound/paperchase.wav Thats the paper chase theme song.

'.... you teach yourselves the law...but i train your minds
you come in here..with a skull full of mush..and if you survive! you leave thinking like a lawyer!'

Well, words that will apply to anyone whos gone to school at any level. Education or for that matter paper qualification is just that. The foundation upon which one builds ones lives. Some call it a safety net. Naturally theres also other means to get that headstart by working and learning the ropes of the trades. Unfortunately too many seem to think a paper qualification is the passport to immediate monetary gain! And an automatic right to get a job! Looking at the applications for jobs that ive received over the years, its a bit scary. The universities and schools are churning out people who cant think. Not to mention of low standards. Proficiency of language is a nightmare. OK, my profienciency is bad... really bad. I've always wished i had spent more time reading more rather than drool at attractive pictures during my younger days. Even now, reading is restricted to the newspapers and the occasional fiction books. The book rack is sort of filled with many books bought that merely gather dust.

As usual, i digress too much. Theres supposedly thousands of unemployed graduates out there. First and foremost i would suggest all be sent to study english. It helps if they are multi lingual. Its better when english is one of the languages they know. But then again, once a blue moon we do come across some who arent so proficient but are willing to learn. Have one in the office. He was willing to learn. He answered questions well. Able to think and able to reason. After a few years he is still with us, and his command of english has improved. And he's become more confident.

The thing is, the government has got itself to blame for churning out too many graduates. Supply isnt matching demand." I cant think straight. Painkillers doing a great job now. Time to sleep, again.

"whats wrong, why is it wrong. 29th June 2005
I was typing and typing and typing. And i realised it was too long to be posted as a comment to Noh's comment. So here goes. I blame it on the heavy lunch that mom packed and sent over.

1.IMHO its all got to do with the general asian mentality. Everything is measured in monetary terms. Asset accumulation. The need to show that one has the material fruits of labour. And when the race started, anyone staying out is left out to fend for themselves. Those earlier days when we were younger, most of us had a carefree life. Yes there was sufferings. We didnt take things too seriously (on hindsight perhaps we should have studied harder/smarter). And yet we somewhat turned out ok. We're not robbing or killing or raping, amongst other vices. And i could like to think most of us arent croonies!.

We had top students who we were proud of. I still remember back in 1983 i was watching the national news at second college in kg baru. They were announcing the STPM results. Only 5 students in the country achieved 5As! ONLY 5!! And one of them was from English College. Someone we knew. There was a feeling of pride. This guy achieved glory for himself and the school.

Now, we have hundreds or thousands getting straight 5As! In some cases tens of them within a school! Someone please re-assure me that the young ones are getting much smarter nowadays. Perhaps its easier to score As nowadays? I have no idea. But once society starts to judge its students based on the distinctions that theyve obtained, then theres no turning back. Its a race. Who cares whether the students have gained knowledge. As long as they have the As, theyre entitled for rewards.


If the Govt. was serious about walking the talk, they will publish the names of everyone who has obtained scholarships and their results. And for heavens sake can we have a standardised system for the form 6. Why create room for doubt by having a separate matriculation system and then equating both. I went through 2 months of form 6 and immediately knew there was no way i was going to excel, or pass for that matter. And i was lucky enough to hop over to the U and enjoy the benefits of the semester system. You get tested every few weeks or months. Unlike the STPM where you get tested for one and half years work!

2. While some in govt. knows the importance of english, there are also those who play the politics game. To remain popular with the older rural populace. The very ones who keep saying the national language must be given priority, are the very ones who are not writing enough to broaden our knowledge base. The amount of material in english is in abundance. Perhaps we should introduce a system whereby right from the primary school, one has got to pass english and malay language subjects.Fail either of the subjects and you stay in your level. No promotion. Perhaps then there will be people taking languages seriously. But then again, knowing the malaysia boleh spirit, more often than not, most students will get the answers from their nice teachers beforehand.

3. I think its any govt.'s duty to provide education at low cost to ALL its citizens.The buku pinjaman scheme was good. I benefited from the scheme. Parents saved lots of hard earned money by not having to buy kilograms of books every year! The helping hand should stop at that. Facilities are given. But standards must be maintained. If the product of students are not up to standard, fail them. Let them repeat again. Our problem seems to be that some quarters think its the govt.'s duty to provide education, pass the students and then give them jobs that pay good money! :O And in the same breath, they want the country to be a centre of education!

Sad to say, i think its the govt.'s policy to make it hard to fail substandard students. The professional institution that i am a member of had a feedback session once, a few years ago, with a local university. We gave constructive criticism. Students lacked good command of english and practical knowledge. And the U reps admitted, for every student that they fail, they need to justify the failure. There was lots of questioning by the higher ups. And having been a product of the place, i know as a fact its so very difficult to fail, unless one is there looking for failure. I was on that verge once, but probably some kind hearted souls facilitated my moving on.

Bottom line will be, those needing help, must be helped. Those who can stand on their own two feet, must do just that.

4. CVs that shows lots of job movement is indicative the person will probably treat every job as a stepping stone. There are some here in JB who may be quite good at their jobs, but in the social circles they've been labelled as job hoppers. Its to their detriment. Its not like as though at every hop they climb up the ladder. Performing well, and job hopping vertically is a very positive thing.

5. Everythings about having cash in the wallet NOW. Even is something is wrong, more often than not people will just keep quiet instead of bringing the matter to your attention. Theres lots of pride and sense of belonging when the company pays them top dollar and 5 digit bonuses year in year out :)) Have a slowdown, and they consider jumping ship!

6. Agree with you, Noh. Top 1% deserves the scholarships. Bond them to serve the country in return. Perhaps everyone else can get study loans which will be converted to scholarships if they get top results? And for heavens sake, if people who take loans dont pay, just go after them! The govt. dept. mentality has just got to go. There was a case of a guy passing and able to pay back within a year, instead of paying monthly for years. He wrote and asked to pay back in one lump sum! So admirable! And our administrators tell him, NO! He has to pay in installments!!!!! This mentality amongst administrators in the civil service is so prevalent. The best arent running the country, sad to say.

7. On race issues. Honestly speaking, i think i was living under a coconut shell during the school years at English College. Its either that or things were not so bad those days. If youre good, youre rewarded. If youre good, youre selected for sports team in school. Or if you talk too much, you get selected to the english debating team, even if you suck big time. (sigh.. still have nightmares. Losing to SDJ, and me not playing my part still annoys me. Was that the time i first met Kuljeet the pilot? My memory fails. Need to check with him. We were the opposition to the topic of co-ed schools are better, or something to that effect. Damn. EC had girls in form 6. Some were nice to look at [the days when girls wore short skirts and white blouses to school] We were in form 5 and wanted girls in the school, and we were asked to oppose the motion!. How to win lah. But then again SDJ was an all boys school, and didnt have girls at all. Easier for them to argue hypothetically! ).

Come to Gurney Road, and oops, i was in a different world. Everything was segregated. And its then the issue hits straight in the face. Self realisation? Yeah, perhaps. The indians hanging out with themselves. The malays hanging out with themselves albeit in two camps.. PAS and the moderate. The buddhists hanging out in their corner. And the Christians hanging out at their corner. Everyone knew where they had to hang out. Was never comfortable at KL. Was used to a mixed race environment all the way till the end of Form 5. Knowing lots of classmates went overseas on federal scholarships that were never made known to me, changed my perspective of the world that i lived in. Living in the U, reinforced that perspective.

Coming out to the work world, it became apparent the civil service was the domain of one race. Even the state economic developement corporation was off limits. That left only the private sector. And i couldnt talk any of the chinese dialects! (saying the chinese words that i knew at that time, didnt qualify me to claim knowing the language). I have to admit that i was lucky an uncle knew another uncle at the top of one of the govt. departments and arranged an introduction. That person was nice enough to write a letter of introduction and i was offered a position at my current place. 17 years later, i think ive been very lucky and made the most of the opportunities that came my way.

We try hard to maintain a fairly balanced work place with no single dominant race. And everything is tied down to performance. The good ones get rewarded. Naturally in the course of doing business, the race issue props up every now and then. And more often than not, we tend to lose out. It doesnt help either that the company doesnt have the benefit of having an english or international name with associate offices all over the world. (most dont bother to realise even those with those names, are basically run by locals of similar standing). So much for not judging the book by its cover.

Perhaps we need a Race Commission. On equal rights. Then we may stop hearing of discriminations in the civil service as well as the private sector. Elaborate lah, madnoh. We're all adults whut :) I've long endured the snub of being left out of conversations all because some decide to talk in a language thats not english or malay. :))

8. Gone are the days the employer can call a staff into the room, and "screw" the person verbally. Doing that only results in the employee leaving and you receiving a notice of being sued for abuse. The management has had to change. More diplomacy. More kindness and polite words. This is a good thing. Where the staff dont repent or change, give sufficient notice and ask the person to leave. But i would say most are still hard working, with constant supervision. Being humans, most employees will always find opportunities to take breaks.

9. Rich, well-to-do parents. They build the fortune, the children spend it. The grandchildren finish the fortune. Thats a chinese saying right? In most cases its true. As usual theres always exceptions. Children who take advantage of the opportunities they get and excel. Our old friend Ben comes to the mind. Well to do, and he excelled. He's a cancer specialist now i think. I should have called him long ago.

10. The internet has indeed become a major distraction to the productive world.Cant help it cos its addictive. Blogging though i do only when am free. Chatting was the killer. Was so addicted. There were times i would come in early and yak and yak and yak online and not get work done. Well, everyones entitled to make mistakes :D On the plus side have learnt a lot. On work, on IT, on people, on relations. err and on things that turn on people. lol. Have managed to meet up with so many, from all over.

To effect change, the government should start the ball rolling. Start recruiting the best brains. The most capable. Stop asking for the race or religion of applicants.Promote based on merit. On capability. Not on who the applicant knows, or the ball-carrying the person has does. Show to the world and the private sector particularly theyre being fair to all. And ensure that the civil service does its job. To serve the public and not serve their own pockets!

And on a final note, to scrap the "get back our best brains from overseas" program. It wont work. Theyre already earning top bucks overseas. We should concentrate on keeping our best brains in the country. Singapore has been tapping our schools from form 1 onwards. We have to stop that. Reward deserving students early without them having to ask. And at the end of the day, perhaps, the country will reap the benefits of these actions. We become better. And happier.

The day i sat for my first year first semester exam for the compulsory islamic studies or something subject, and saw the first question, i gave up on the U. It was run by insensitive asses. That first question sidelined the entire non-muslim student community and all subsequent complaints was brushed aside.It was an objective question which went along the lines of which of the following religions originated from revelations by God. Naturally, i marked all the spaces - A to E. And naturally it was the wrong answer in the U's eyes.

The first thing i did when i was the editor of the student magazine in my dept. during my final year, was to critisize the quality of lecturers. People who had no practical knowledge and only a first degree called themselves lecturers. Unfortunately that article never got published. The head of dept. called me aside and told me (words ill remember forever)..'lets not make our secret the world's secret!'

Defining moment during my stay there would be during my fourth year and my colleague asking the lecturer a simple question. In arriving at a solution to a problem, the lecturer had said that certain percentage adjustments needed to be made. For example, a land fronting the main road against a land immediately behind it. The fore was more valuable. Better accessibility, commercial exposure, potential for development etc etc. Colleague asked how would one arrive at the percentage adjustments..and her nonchalant reply was one did it based on experience. Naturally, all of us grinned. And my fellow student retorted and said...that would mean people who just graduated with no experience would therefore not be able to work!!! Everyone except the lecturer laughed. She was pissed mad. She just made a fool out of herself. Cos in actual fact, there are quantitative means to arrive at such adjustments. Thats another story.

Then again, i cant be too harsh on them. Screwed up my final year project paper cos i had loads of personal problems and i sort of didnt like the supervisor. The paper went in without her vetting. I got "taruh"ed during the viva. Scared shit during the holidays, and so relieved to scrape through at the end.

And they had to further spoil entire experience by asking us to wear songkoks during graduation! duhhh big time.

The most memorable encounter with a female chatter!

There i was. Sitting patiently at a quiet corner at the freezing KLIA. The time was around midnight. It was sometime in the late 1990s. 1998? 1999? My memory fails me yet again. Topaz was one of the first friends i had encountered in yahoo chat and we migrated to ICQ (which was a big thing back then. Now? ive no idea whatsoever)

She was funny and direct. Very outspoken and wasnt the shy type. We had lots of interesting chats. She was a traffic warden in Perth. She drove a 4000 or 5000 cc vehicle that they called a car. Thunderbird? Something... i cant remember :)) She loved her job and she had lots of free time. One fine day she said she was flying into KL and asked if it was possible to meet up!!!! YES! Perfect idea!

After an hour of waiting, it was beginning to be very uncomfortable. The coldness in the arrival hall was a killer. So much for intelligent building systems. They cant even adjust the airconditioning temp. to comfy levels. Finally the plane landed. Touchdown. And the second phase of waiting begun. The usual waiting for luggage being delivered and their respective owners praying their luggages dont get misdirected or pilfered. At the last minute, i realised i forgot to buy something for her. And ran to the souvenier shops. None open except the choc shops! Naturally went for a big box of ferrero rocher. If she didnt like it, i could eat it. Or we could share :D

Stood there waiting at the arrival hall. And there she came, walking, with a beaming smile on her lovely face. I wasnt prepared for the overwhelming moment. Had seen her photo earlier but it was of poor resolution and taken from afar. Here was a lady in her late 20s, standing around 5'10", slim and probably weighing around 55-60kg, blue eyes and ahem... well endowed. C cup was my silent guess. We hugged and exchanged pleasantries. She was a really sweet lady. She needed to check in at the airport hotel. We walked over and brought the luggage to her room. Gave her the chocolates and she was pleased. And she insisted on unpacking.

She brought a small koala bear stuffed toy, a table cloth with the australia map and a mouse pad! And in return i only gave chocs. Felt damn guilty..lol. We talked a lot. We got something to eat and drink. And time stood still. We were going on and on and before long it was almost 330am! She was on transit at 9am or thereabouts and needed sleep. And it was time to leave. We hugged and said our goodbyes.

Many months later she got engaged and married a chat friend of hers from USA, and they got married on a riverboat in Perth on Valentines Day.

But that night at KLIA was unforgetable. She was worth the travel and 2 hour wait at KLIA. Oh yes, my mrs too enjoyed her company and found her to be a very nice person.

The week that was
25th of June came and passed by. As it is, we dont celebrate anything this year. But having to struggle around at home cos of pain, is a real downer.

Had left to KL with Peter on Monday evening. It was a good drive. We checked into the hotel and after a while went up to KLCC to meet sf, mia, coco and max. It was an interesting meet up. Was meeting Mia for the first time eventhough we have known each other on chat for a few years.

Tuesday was the start of the conference. Nothing spectacular, but it had some interesting moments. The talk on diet made me lose a bit of appetite for an hour or so. Had an interesting discussion with an Indian gentleman working at Jeddah, as well as a senior land surveyor attached with the Survey Department. Followed up with dinner and shopping with the latter at MidValley. It was a reminder not to bother heading there again. The traffic jams and mess in the carpark was a real dampener.

Wednesday morning. Arghh. Was adjusting the water flow from the taps. The water was flowing out slowly and stagnating a bit in the bath tub. The next moment i was falling backwards with the flimsy shower curtain breaking my fall. Ribs fell on the edge of the bath tub and the head just missed the water closet! Very noisy fall. And Peter who was outside didnt realise .... BRB.. OK, am back after like 16 hours later :) Struggled out of the bath and told Peter what happened.

The ribs were ok. Made the mistake of not putting an ice pack immediately. Struggled a bit but could still move about and drive. Made a verbal complain at the reception that there wasnt a non-slip mat in the bath tub, and that water was draining out too slowly. The subang medical centre was just next to sheraton, and yet was just too lazy to pop next door and check up on the injury. Peter had to drive as i was feeling to uncomfortable. That evening when we got back, we noticed that nothing was done about the complaint. Again we verbally informed the reception on what had happened. And off we went to KLCC for dinner. This time it was with sf, farmy and a male friend of farmy. Had earlier called Luq, an old school mate, and he joined us.

When we got back to the hotel, as expected nothing was done. Called the reception and asked if one had to fall and break one's head before the hotel would do something. The nice handyman popped by within minutes. It seems that the non slip mats were recently removed from all the hotel rooms. He had no idea why though.

The next morning off we went for the AGM. Half way through, i slipped out and went shopping :) Yeah, did shopping while in pain. Checked out of the hotel and told a guy at the reception that i was surprised no one from the hotel ever bothered to ask me what sort of injury i sustained and why i was complaining. So much for making guests happy and making their stay a pleasant one. Only at that point did the guy ask if i wished to speak to the duty manager. So much that will do considering i was leaving. I'll probably write a letter to the GM later.

On the drive down, I called up my fellow director, Ong. We stopped by Tangkak and got durians compliments of Ong. Two big bags, perhaps about 30 fruits. Dropped off Peter at his home. Passed a few fruits to a colleague at the office and was back home around 8 plus. Carrying the durians, luggage etc probably aggravated the pain. It was a torture to lie down and to wake up.

The next day dropped the kids at mom's place, and took a cab straight to the medical centre. Seems theres a fracture and the prescription was a corset and painkillers. Thats it. And yeah,lots of rest. Sigh.

I hate falling sick. I hate being cooped up. Yes, having the internet at home does help. But given a choice would rather be at the office. I'll probably take a cab or get my staff to come pick me up tomorrow. As for today, am off shortly. Take my painkillers, and sleep. sleep. sleep. And wait for my bro to send lunch over.

"Based on the movie, written by John Osborne, The Paper Chase is a classroom drama about students in a law school (based on Harvard Law School). The two main characters are a stern but fair Contract Law professor, Charles W. Kingsfield, and a student who idolizes him, James Hart. The Paper Chase was voted the best new drama of 1978.

Wish had lecturers like him when i was studying. It was an outstanding series on the lives of law students. There was one defining episode. The student while cyling on the road in the city, hit a pothole, fell and had an injury. He sued the city council. And he was having a tough time winning cos the general consensus or rebuttal by the city was that he ought to have been more responsible and careful while cycling.

In class one day, Kingsfield, while talking about contract laws and responsibilities of parties, made a statement while looking at this particular student. The city council when providing facilities and amenities and discharging its duties for the people, owe a GREATER RESPONSIBILITY to the people to ensure the wellness of the people. My memory fails me on the exact words. But the message that stuck to the mind was, when one is in authority, or presides over others, then one owes a greater responsibility over them. You cant just say youve done your job and the people have got to be careful. Youve got to ensure nothing negative results as a result of you discharging your duties. I guess we have yet to reach this level of responsibility in this country. Things get screwed up and those in power will more often than not say its God's will, or an accident.

Ok..i blabber too much. Summary of thoughts has never been my forte."

No, i've not become a saint or a saintly person. Dont even let that thought cross your mind. Its just that once a while the mind wanders. In moments of utter boredom when theres nothing else to do, the mind guides the physical self to places that one should go more regularly for one's well-being, but more often than not it doesnt.

Was bored last night. And happened to drop by an old favourite resource centre. Theres much to learn, yet the mind refuses to be disciplined.

Worked till late last night. The kids were still up around 11pm! Was pleasantly surprised. Played with them a bit before making sure they slept early. It rained in the morning. That meant more time with them. Only left home around 11am for the office.

Its been a quiet morning at the office. Cleared some reports, signed some documents. And it was lunch time! Time flies when one comes to work late! Been talking a few people from different backgrounds. Its like a worrying trend. Everyone repeating the same mantra. The economy is slowing. The market is very slow. The post chinese new year pickup in the market did not materialise. The softening in the share market has just compounded the problem. Over supply in the developer launches hasnt been helpful. The coming housing fair will probably confirm what the market perceives and feels. Its going to be slow for many months. Its the Federal Government who appears to be pushing for change and development in JB now. Sad sad situation. One of the richest states being so mismanaged to the point theyve lost control. Appearing to be a beggar. The privatisation mantra of the pre-crash period has clearly failed to benefit the state and its people. Those who benefited are clearly the recipients of such projects and the decision makers. Could write pages on the craps that has been happening over the years in JB particularly. Will have to wait for another day.

Just received a phone call. An aunt is unwell. Hospitalised with pneumonia! Sigh. Pray for her to get well soon. Need to visit her shortly.

Anger Management
http://www.hinduism-today.com/archives/2004/7-9/40-49_anger.shtml
July/August/September, 2004

INSIGHT
Anger Management
How to Tame our Deadliest Emotion
By Satguru Bodhinatha Veylanswami

Two cars bang fenders at an intersection; tempers flare and a fistfight breaks out. In a store nearby, a man stomps off in a fury, cursing the clerk for declining his credit card. In an apartment up the street, a mother screams at her daughter to clean up her room. Down the block, a schoolgirl pouts because her father won't let her date an older boy. Around the corner a man slaps his eight-year-old son because he won't sit still in the car. Anger is everywhere. It is the most powerful and hurtful emotion we possess. Yet, the average person succumbs to it helplessly, willingly, lapsing into insane episodes now and again without thinking much about it. Many would defend it as if it were an ally, a tool they would not live without.

Anger is expressed by humanity in drastically different manners. Low-minded individuals take great delight in being angry toward others and expressing that anger in aggressive and violent ways--gang wars, robbery, vandalism and more. They deliberately use anger and violence to get what they want from life. Then there are the mass of generally law-abiding people who live a normal, working life but are seriously angry on the inside about one thing or another and express that anger regularly in their words and actions. They are simply angry at life and have neither the means nor the motivation to eliminate anger from their lives.

Anger and the spiritual path: Finally, there are those who are striving to live a life following spiritual principles but are at times unable to control their anger and as a result end up hurting others and breeching Hinduism's core principal of nonviolence, ahimsa, as well as creating new negative karmas to live through in the future. It is to these individuals, who are striving to control anger, even eliminate it from their pattern of behavior, that this Insight is addressed.

To improve our understanding and control of anger, it is helpful to look at the concept of the three-fold nature of man: 1) superconscious or spiritual, 2) intellectual or mental and 3) instinctive or physical-emotional. It is the instinctive nature, the animal-like nature, that contains the tendencies to become angry and harm others. The goal of living a religious life is to learn to control these animal instincts--as well as the ramifications of the intellect and the pride of the ego--and thereby manifest one's spiritual nature. Spiritual striving produces gradual improvement in harnessing and transmuting our instincts, intellect and ego, with the entire process of soul evolution spanning many lifetimes.

Anger is the instinctive behavior of responding to challenging situations by becoming frustrated, upset, enraged to the point of attacking others with words or fists. Webster compares the terms for anger as follows: "Anger is broadly applicable to feelings of resentful or revengeful displeasure; indignation implies righteous anger aroused by what seems unjust, mean or insulting; rage suggests a violent outburst of anger in which self-control is lost; fury implies a frenzied rage that borders on madness; ire, chiefly a literary word, suggests a show of great anger in acts, words, looks, etc.; wrath implies deep indignation expressing itself in a desire to punish or get revenge."

Learning to control anger is such an important part of harnessing the instinctive nature that the 2,200-year-old, South Indian scripture on ethics, the Tirukural, devotes an entire chapter to the subject. It is, in fact, the chapter that precedes "Avoidance of Injuring Others "-- the order of these chapters itself suggesting that to successfully practice nonviolence we need to first control anger. The Tirukural warns that anger gives rise to teeming troubles. It kills the face's smile and the heart's joy. Left uncontrolled, it will annihilate you. It burns even friends and family who try to intervene, and easily leads to injuring others.

A few years ago we had a perfect opportunity to observe serious anger. Two carpenters were building a house next door to the monastery. One carpenter, James, was more prone to anger than the other. Every few minutes, when something didn't work out right, he would react by swearing loudly and at length. About once a week the two men would have a huge argument and James would drop his tools, stomp off the job and drive away with tires squealing in defiance. It was definitely an interesting study in anger and human nature, showing how anger is simply an accepted part of life for many people.

Swami Budhananda (1917-1983) of the Ramakrishna Mission, noted in a series of talks on anger (published in Vedanta Kesari, http://www.sriramakrishnamath.org): "The evil effects of anger are innumerable. The first thing that happens to an angry person is that he forgets the lessons of wisdom he has learnt in life. After that, he loses control over his thoughts and emotions. He becomes overactive, with his highly charged ego as his only guide. He loses his power of discrimination, sense of proportion, and becomes aggressive in manner, hostile to his own welfare. When anger becomes the second nature of a person, physical health and equanimity of mind suffer, and inner peace vanishes in a trice. Anger can destroy friendships, families, business partnerships, professional prospects. Communal and ethnic riots, arsons, wars, suicides, murder and many other forms of crime are basically products of anger. In fact, anger makes even a handsome person look ugly. I suggested to a friend, who is remorseful about his flashes of anger, that he keep a large mirror facing his office desk. In case the anger-prone person has a lively sense of humor, this mirror-therapy is likely to work."

People's natures are quite different in their tendency to anger. Some are usually calm, but occasionally flare up. Others anger quite easily. Many people are quite selective about whom they get angry with--perhaps just their spouse.

My Gurudeva, Satguru Sivaya Subramuniyaswami, observed that anger is the most difficult fault to overcome, because it manifests in so many different forms: pouting, long silences, shouting, yelling, swearing and more. In Living with Siva, Gurudeva lists the eight forms of anger from the book Angry All the Time (see below): 1) sneaky anger; 2) the cold shoulder; 3) blaming and shaming; 4) swearing and yelling; 5) demands and threats; 6) chasing and holding; 7) partly controlled violence; 8) blind rage. These are called the eight rungs on the ladder of violence, an analogy that Gurudeva found quite helpful in showing how anger can easily snowball. For example, an evening might start with a mild expression of anger that seems harmless enough but soon escalates into shouting and swearing and culminates in physical violence.

Anger and the chakras: We gain useful insights into the nature of anger and how to control it by relating it to the Hindu system of chakras, the subtle centers of consciousness within each individual (see sidebar). There are seven primary chakras along the spinal column and in the head. When our awareness is flowing through these chakras, consciousness is in the higher nature. The seven chakras, or talas, below the spine, down to the feet, are all seats of instinctive consciousness, the origin of fear, anger, jealousy, confusion, selfishness, absence of conscience and malice. The eighth rung on the ladder of violence--blind rage--corresponds to the second lower chakra, called vitala. Gurudeva explains, "Anger comes from despair or the threatening of one's self-will. When people are in the consciousness of this chakra, they are even angry at God. With their wrath, they often strike out at those around them, leaving a trail of hurt feelings behind them. From sustained anger arises a persistent, even burning, sense of resentment."

When someone goes into a blind rage, he has dropped far below the chakras of memory and reason--the muladhara and svadhishthana. Therefore it is no wonder that afterwards he may not even remember what happened. His consciousness was totally in the vitala chakra, having given up its normal faculties of memory and reason.

Many people think that sneaky anger and the cold shoulder are natural and harmless. Gurudeva warns that, while they are not as vicious as yelling and screaming or throwing objects against the wall, these practices stimulate the lower chakras and over time can easily lead to the more violent expressions of anger, as well as the experience of other lower-chakra emotions, such as fear and jealousy. For these reasons, it is best not to indulge in either sneaky anger or the cold shoulder. Sarcasm and cynicism can also be forms of anger. Gurudeva said, "People who are cynical are expressing their anger and contempt with snide remarks. They may seem to be joking, but their sharp feelings come across anyway, which stimulates that lower chakra until one day their cynicism will turn into really good anger. Then they build up new karmas they never had before, which they will live with until they are faced with those karmas."

Swearing is even more problematic, as it stimulates the lower chakras to a greater degree than sneaky anger, the cold shoulder or cynicism. Therefore, it is quite important in managing anger to break the habit of swearing.

Step one for conquering anger: For those on the spiritual path who are striving to control anger, there is an important first step. That is to acknowledge that anger is a serious problem that easily leads to violence and is a quality that should be totally absent from those dedicated to making progress in their spiritual life.

I gave the following advice via e-mail to a devotee who was working to refrain from expressing occasional anger toward a parent: "Thank you for sharing the details regarding your angry encounters with your parent. I would suggest you reflect on the seriousness of disharmony in the home. It is taking a few steps backward in spiritual progress. When you do sadhana, you move forward. But if you become angry regularly, you step backward, and as a result you could end up standing still. It is like trying to save money for a special purpose. You save for a while, but then become angry, which is like spending what you saved for the last month. It is difficult to make your financial goal. By taking anger more seriously, you are more motivated to avoid it at all costs."

The devotee recently e-mailed again saying the advice had helped her cope with the force of anger. She had taken the first step--acknowledging that it is a serious problem, an unacceptable mode of behavior for those on the spiritual path.

Seven remedies: With this resolve firmly in mind, she was ready to take the second step, which is to apply remedies to improve her behavior. In the following sidebar, we offer seven remedies. The first is to affirm the Hindu philosophy that everything in the universe is perfect; the entire physical, mental, emotional and spiritual flow of events is moving in perfect harmony and exquisite coordination according to the divine laws of karma and dharma. Each happening is as perfect as an ocean wave or a butterfly's wing. Anger is an instinctive-emotional protest to what is happening at a particular moment. "Things are just not right!" anger declares. The source of peace and contentment is the opposite sentiment--a wholesome, intelligent acceptance of life's conditions, based on the understanding that God has given us a perfect universe in which to grow and learn, and each challenge or seeming imperfection we encounter is an opportunity for spiritual advancement. Gurudeva wrote: "We are all growing toward God, and experience is the path. Through experience we mature out of fear into fearlessness, out of anger into love, out of conflict into peace, out of darkness into light and union in God."

The second remedy is a first-aid technique to apply during angry outbursts. It is to visualize light blue flooding out from the center of your spine into your aura, displacing the blackish reds that anger automatically displays in the colorful field of subtle energy radiating within and around your body. Mystically, this has the effect of moving your awareness out of the angry state of mind into a more peaceful mood. The third remedy is to worship Lord Ganesha, the elephant-faced Lord of Dharma, a compassionate God, ever available to assist embodied souls with immediate needs to further their evolution. Remedy four is a penance, setting aside a specified sum of money every time you experience anger. The fifth remedy is to skip the next meal if you become angry. These two sacrifices are designed to remold deep-seated subconscious patterns, called vasanas, convincing your subconscious that you are serious about controlling your anger, and gradually subduing any occurrence of wrath. Remedy six, the flower penance, is a way of letting go of angry feelings that you hold toward another person. Offering flowers with a loving heart has the effect of dissolving the resentment and awakening forgiveness--be it toward a parent, spouse, employer, sibling or friend. The seventh remedy is to perform three kindly acts toward someone who has disturbed you. For a loved one or close acquaintance, the acts can be performed openly. For others, such as business associates, employers or fellow employees, your good deeds may be done subtly, even without their knowledge. It may be difficult to fulfill this, as it requires you to go against the instinctive compulsion to hold on to hard feelings. But acting kindly toward offenders releases you from the grip of seething anger, as surely as the sun dispels a morning fog, dissolving it in the light of higher consciousness. The seven remedies are designed to help seekers objectify their anger, to see it in a clear, detached manner, as a force that they have the power to harness and transmute into higher forms of expression and ultimately be free of it altogether.

Diet and ayurveda: What we eat influences our state of consciousness and where we are in the chakras more than most people realize. The Hindu ideal of following a strict vegetarian diet has many benefits, including lessening the tendency to become angry. Eating meat, fish, fowl and eggs, on the other hand, opens the door to lower consciousness and makes it harder to stay out of the states of fear, anger, jealousy and the subsequent remorseful emotions that follow. Food is largely a matter of temperament. The Chandogya Upanishad (7.26.2) teaches: "When the food is pure, mind becomes pure. When the mind becomes pure, memory becomes firm. And when a man is in possession of a firm memory, all the bonds which tie him down to the world are loosened." A vegetarian diet helps put us in touch with our higher consciousness and is therefore quite helpful in increasing our control over anger, as well as the other lower states of mind.

In the healthcare industry, anger is viewed as an insidious malady that, if not harnessed, leads to serious illness, causing high blood pressure, various diseases and even fatal heart attacks. It is addressed with prescription drugs, aromatherapy, massage and homeopathy. The Hindu medical science, ayurveda, views anger as a primary sign of imbalance of the three bodily humors, known as doshas. Dr. Virender Sodhi of Bellevue, Washington (http://www.ayurvedicscience.com), explained, "Anger is under the control of the pitta dosha. Pitta is intelligence, anger, digestion, fire, sight and so on. At the mental level, we have four drives: anger, attachment, ego and desire for sex. Although all these are normal animal behaviors, imbalance in these leads to imbalance of their respective doshas. Just as attachment increases kapha, anger increases pitta. Imbalance in pitta dosha can cause excessive anger, liver maladies, hypertension, etc. Balance is achieved by calming yoga, shitali pranayama, walks, mantra, self analysis and diverting the anger into a different form. Ayurvedic medicine also advises cooling foods and environment."

Dr. Vasant Lad, director of the Ayurvedic Institute (http://www.ayurveda.com) in Albuquerque, New Mexico, offers basic remedies for anger in The Complete Book of Ayurvedic Home Remedies:

"Pitta is necessary for right understanding and judgment, but when it gets disturbed or out of balance, it creates misunderstanding and wrong judgment, leading to anger and hostility. Here are several simple home remedies to cool down that hot pitta and keep tempers under control.

"Diet: Perhaps most important, a person who becomes angry easily or often should follow the pitta-pacifying diet, especially avoiding hot, spicy and fermented foods, citrus fruit and sour fruit. Favor simple, bland foods and cool drinks, and avoid alcohol and drinks with caffeine.

"Keep cool: It's also not recommended for people with a pitta body type to take saunas or steam baths, to get overheated from exercise or sports, or to be in too much direct sun.

"Oil massage: Rub some bhringaraj oil or coconut oil on your scalp and on the soles of the feet. That will help to bring down the excess pitta. You can do this every night before getting in bed to regularly moderate pitta.

"Sandalwood oil: Another simple and effective way to help balance your emotions is to place a drop of sandalwood essential oil on the third eye area between your eyebrows, as well as on the throat, breastbone, navel, temples and wrists.

"Herbal teas: Take 1 teaspoon of chamomile and 1 teaspoon of fresh, finely chopped cilantro leaves and steep them in 1 cup hot water for about 10 minutes. Allow this tea to cool before you drink it. You can drink it three times a day, after each meal.

"Ghee nasya: Dip your little finger into a jar of brahmi ghee (or plain ghee) and lubricate the inside of your nostrils with a small amount. (Make sure your nails are trimmed so you don't scratch yourself.) Then gently inhale the ghee upward. This sends a calming message to the brain.

"Shitali pranayama: Make a tube of your tongue; breathe deeply through your mouth down into your belly, hold the breath for a few seconds; exhale through your nose. Do about 12 repetitions.

"Yoga postures: Good yoga asanas for pitta include the camel, cobra, cow, boat, goat and bridge poses. Avoid the headstand or other inverted poses, such as the plow and shoulder stand.

"Meditate: There is an ancient method of meditation that involves watching your every emotion come and go, without either naming it or trying to tame it. As the feelings arise, breathe deeply and exhale the emotions out."

Anger and spiritual striving: Anger is a natural emotion, a protective function of the instinctive mind, not to be vilified or feared. It is a part of our nature, and it is normal to express it--that is, if we are content to live on the instinctive level of our being, which many people are. But each soul inevitably reaches a point where it seeks to harness the natural instincts. Gurudeva explained, "Anger is also, like fear, an instinctive control, and at one time served its purpose. The onrush of anger served to protect man's private interests in critical situations by injecting adrenaline into his blood and thus preparing him for defense. But as man evolves closer to his real, actinic being, he discovers that actinic love, understanding, compassion and wisdom are higher qualities than anger."

Managing anger is important for anyone who seeks success at sophisticated endeavors and stable, wholesome relationships. For aspirants seeking self-transformation on the spiritual path, it is absolutely essential, for only when the lower nature is subdued can the divine nature be fully expressed.

Daily spiritual efforts designed to bring forth the divine nature are known as sadhana, such as japa, meditation and yoga. As Gurudeva wrote, sadhana, spiritual discipline, is "the mystical, mental, physical and devotional exercise that enables us to dance with Siva by bringing inner advancement, changes in perception and improvements in character. Sadhana allows us to live in the refined and cultured soul nature, rather than in the outer, instinctive or intellectual spheres." But, Gurudeva warned, every time you become angry, you destroy one month's worth of spiritual striving and practice, or sadhana. So, if you don't control anger, performing sadhana is a waste of time. Hence, the number-one sadhana is anger management. Gurudeva is adamant that seekers refrain from any serious meditative practices until anger and other lower emotions have been harnessed. "Those who remain prone to anger should not do raja yoga or any form of intensive mantra, japa, or pranayama amplification of the energies into higher chakras--lest that collective energy plummet into the corresponding lower chakras and be vented through fear, anger and jealousy. Rather, they should perform the always healing vasana daha tantra [writing down and burning recollections of the past] and confine themselves to karma yoga, such as cleaning in and around the temple and picking flowers for the pujas. These simple acts of charya [humble service] are recommended, but should not be extended to intense worship. Then, and only then, their life will be in perspective with the philosophy of Sanatana Dharma and begin to become one with Siva's perfect universe. Brahmadvara, the door to the seven chakras below the muladhara, will then be sealed off as their experiential patterns settle into the traditional perspective of how life should be and each individual should behave within it."

When working to harness the instinctive nature, what is it that tells us how well we are doing? It is the subtle irritation, the seed of wrath, that preceeds every form of anger, from the cold shoulder to blind rage. Viewed in this way, the impulse to anger is--at the beginning of the path, the intermediate stages and even subtly at the upper reaches--our astute teacher, signaling to us each split-second opportunity to be more patient, more understanding, more compassionate and to find a better way to cope with tense situations and keep closed the door to the lower chakras.
The Perils Of Anger:
The Tirukural Chapter 31
By Saint Tiruvalluvar, 200 bce

1. It is restraint that restrains rage when it can injure. If it cannot harm, what does restraint really matter?

2. Wrath is wrong even when it cannot cause injury, but when it can, there is nothing more evil.

3. Forget anger toward all who have offended you, for it gives rise to teeming troubles.

4. Anger kills the face's smile and the heart's joy. Does there exist a greater enemy than one's own anger?

5. If a man be his own guard, let him guard himself against rage. Left unguarded, his own wrath will annihilate him.

6. Anger's fire engulfs all who draw near it, burning even friends and family who risk rescue.

7. As a man trying to strike the ground with his hand can hardly fail, just as surely will one who treasures his temper be destroyed.

8. Though others inflict wrongs as painful as flaming torches, it is good if a man can refrain from inflammatory tantrums.

9. If hostile thoughts do not invade his mind, all his other thoughts may swiftly manifest.

10. As men who have died resemble the dead, so men who have renounced rage resemble renunciates.
Eight Rungs on the Ladder of Violence

1: Sneaky Anger:
You act and speak normally but purposely neglect to do certain tasks others have asked you to do, pretending that you forgot all about the duties. Example: A teenage boy, upset with his father for firmly disciplining him, retaliates with sneaky anger by chronically "forgetting " to do his household chores.

2: The Cold Shoulder:
You shun another person and make it clear you are mad about something. However, you absolutely refuse to let him or her know what it is. Example: A wife is upset with her husband for working late and, rather than talk the issue through, gives him the silent, cold shoulder for the entire evening.

3: Blaming and Shaming:
You fault others for something that happened and then tell them they are "no good " in order to make them feel shame. Example: an employee makes a simple mistake at work, and her boss is upset. Rather than help resolve the problem, he points blame at her, demeaning and intimidating her with personal criticisms.

4: Swearing, Screaming, Yelling:
You lose control over your speech and scream and yell at others. Those who have a habit of swearing are most prone to this form of anger. Example: A teenage girl has admitted to a minor wrongdoing at school. Her teacher, known for his foul mouth, yells at her harshly, using cruel, out-of-control words to punish her.

5: Demands and Threats:
You demand that others behave as you want them to or threaten you will do something drastic if they don't, such as hurt them or yourself. Example: An argument between two business partners gets out of hand and reaches the point where the younger threatens to beat up his associate unless he gets his way.

6: Chasing and Holding:
You approach or pursue others and physically restrain them against their will and prevent them from leaving your presence. Example: A woman's fiancee has been accused of seeing another woman. Incensed, she follows him to work, grabs him desperately and insists they talk about the problem right now.

7: Partly Controlled Violence:
You physically strike someone for the purpose of forcing him or her to do what you want, but without losing control. Example: A young boy is caught stealing at a neighbor's home. The owner, outraged, confronts the boy and swats him several times with a stick, wrongly thinking that this will reform the errant youth.

8: Blind Rage:
You physically attack a person with total loss of control, to the extent that when you return to normal consciousness, you may not even remember the incident. Example: A sassy teenager deliberately insults an overweight stranger. Instead of just scowling, the fiery man flies into a blind rage and beats him mercilessly.
Wheels of Consciousness

The fourteen chakras are centers of force and consciousness within the inner bodies of man--with corresponding nerve plexuses, ganglia and glands in the physical body. Where we reside in the range of chakras deeply influences our state of mind, our actions and reactions. Anger is the predominant consciousness of the vitala chakra, second among the seven lower chakras, all of which are instinctive realms of distress, darkness and confusion.

1 SAHASRARA...Illumination--crown of head

2 AJNA...Divine sight--third eye

3 VISHUDDHA...Divine love--throat

4 ANAHATA...Direct cognition--heart

5 MANIPURA...Willpower--solar plexus

6 SVADISHTHANA...Reason--below navel

7 MULADHARA...Memory--base of spine

8 ATALA...Fear & lust--hips

9 VITALA...Raging anger--thighs

10 SUTALA...Retaliatory jealousy--knees

11 TALATALA...Prolonged confusion--calves

12 RASATALA...Selfishness--ankles

13 MAHATALA...Consciencelessness--feet

14 PATALA...Malice & murder--soles of feet
Anger's Rousing Threat... and Retorts from Patience, Universal Love and Discrimination

Anger: "I will make the people blind and deaf. I will overpower them with wrath and suffocate them with rage. I will catch hold of even wise men. They shall neither harken to what concerns their own happiness, nor reflect what they had read in the scriptures. In a moment I can destroy even the learned, the famous, those who are attentive to duties, the charitable and the mighty potentates. I can infuse fury, resentment, wrath, indignation into the minds of all in the twinkling of an eye. I am very powerful. I will disturb the tapas of the aspirant and even yogis and destroy serenity. Atman, the soul, despaired, "Alas, who will help me now?" Kshama, the virtue of Patience, spoke up: "I will! I will pull out the venomous tooth of this demon, Anger."Vishva Prema, Universal Love, cried out, "I will! I am the water to quench the fire of anger." Finally, Viveka, Discrimination, roared: "I will! When I rise, anger dies."

Swami Sivananda (1887-1963) founder, Divine Life Society
Seven Remedies for the Habit of Anger

Have you ever suggested to someone who was furious at you that he shouldn't get so angry? Perhaps you offered, "It certainly doesn't make me feel very good when you unleash that force on me! And it's not good for you either!" What was the result? He just got madder, right? "How dare you tell me not to get angry, you #%*$¿ !" The point is, no one can change a person except that person himself. We only change when we want to change. Are you ready? Controlling anger could well be viewed as the very first exercise in spiritual life, because it stands so squarely between the soul and peace of mind while living in a physical body. Nothing is more fundamental to conquer, and doing so unleashes great energy and provides emotional stability for all other endeavors. The work is well worth the effort. So, here are some sharp tools--powerful enough to make even a nice person nicer. They are philosophical, penitential, metaphysical, devotional and psychological. Use them in good health!

1: Affirm: Everything Is Perfect!
From a mountaintop perspective, God is everywhere, in all things, and everything is in a state of balance and perfection at every point in time. Affirm this Hindu wisdom regularly to cultivate patience and wise acceptance, even of situations that tend to arouse anger. To do so, be seated, close your eyes, breathe deeply and affirm quietly to yourself, "I'm all right right now, and everything is as it should be from a mountaintop point of view."

2: Fill Your Aura with Light Blue
If you are overtaken by anger and resentment--emotions which fill your aura with blackish red, streaked with yellow--sit in meditation, breathe and visualize light blue entering your aura and surrounding your body. The light blue will neutralize the fiery reds, and before you know it the anger and resentment will be gone. Simply relax and visualize soothing blue radiating out from the center of your spine into your inner and outer aura.

3: Worship Lord Ganesha
The worship of Lord Ganesha is helpful in overcoming all emotional problems, including anger. As He is seated on the muladhara chakra, tuning in to His shakti helps raise us up into the muladhara chakra and therefore out of anger and fear into a calm, stable state of mind. In fact, you can slowly seal off these lower states of mind and keep awareness permanently lifted above fear and anger through the regular worship of Lord Ganesha.

4: Pay for Each Burst of Ire
An effective and practical financial remedy is to put a sum of money, such as five dollars, in a jar each time you become angry, and later donate that money to a favorite orphanage or temple. Consistently performed, this penance soon makes it too expensive to get angry! This remedy impresses the subconscious mind that expressions of anger have karmic costs, and that anger can be completely eliminated by sincere efforts to overcome it.

5: Don't Eat the Next Meal
For those who can easily afford to put five dollars in a jar frequently, an alternate penance is fasting. Each time anger arises, simply skip the next meal. Denying yourself a meal has a potent impact, deeply impressing your subconscious mind. If you follow this without fail, the instinctive nature soon catches on that whenever it expresses anger it will soon experience hunger, and in this way is motivated to better control this destructive emotion.

6: Offer Flowers
Put up a picture of the person you are angry with and for 31 days place a flower in front of the picture. While doing so, sincerely forgive the person in heart and mind. When it becomes difficult to offer the flower of forgiveness, because hurtful memories come up from the subconscious mind, write down the memories and burn the paper in a trash can. Say, "I forgive you, for I know that you gave back to me the karma that I set in motion."

7: Perform Three Kindly Acts
If you have gotten upset with another person, do three kindly acts to make up for it. This releases you from your anger and guilt even if he or she is unaware of your good deeds. Example: A husband shouts abusively at his wife after returning from work. After apologizing, he takes her dining to a place of her choosing, buys her an item that she needs for the kitchen and gives her some free time by taking care of the younger children for a half-day.
Sagely Reflections

I will permit no man to narrow and degrade my soul by making me hate him.
Booker T. Washington

If you are patient in one moment of anger, you will escape a hundred days of sorrow.
Chinese proverb

Nor he who owns the least of things, nor he whom anger chains, can ever pass through maya's gates. So, give these up sannyasin bold! Say "Om Tat Sat Om!"
Swami Vivekananda

There is nobody who lives happily with anger.
Shantidevi

When we speak with hatred and anger, it leads to unhappiness pain and misery. So one should always be soft spoken.
Yajur Veda 3,4

If we could read the secret histories of our enemies, we should find sorrow and suffering enough to disarm all hostility.
Longfellow

Suppose you have a weakness of getting angry easily. Now what you should do is this: Once you become normal again, go and sit in the family shrine room if you have one, or sit in solitude; then regret and repent your own anger and sincerely pray to your beloved diety or to Mother Nature, seeking help to get rid of it.
Shri Mata Amritanandamayai Devi

There should be no yelling in the home unless there is a fire.
David O. McKay

A nagging sense of discontent, a feeling of being dissatisfied, or of something not being right, is the fuel that gives rise to anger and hatred. Generally this discontent arises in us when we feel that either we ourselves, or someone we love, or our close friends are being treated unfairly or threatened: people are being unjust toward us or our close friends....The idea is to stop it at an early stage, rather than wait for that anger or hatred to arise fully.
The Dalai Lama

Resentment is like taking poison and waiting for the other person to die.
Malachy McCourt

Worshippers of Siva who are victim to anger or hatred refrain from meditation, japa, and kundalini yoga. They confess sins, do pennance and engage in bhakti and karma yoga to raise consciousness. Aum Namah Sivaya.
Satguru Sivaya Subramuniyaswami